January 17, 2020
Each week a BA Woman contributes to our BA Women's Words—a bloglette posted on Friday mornings where we tackle gendered issues to advance the educational, personal, and professional development of women who seek to make a difference in the world.
Read on for EmpowHERing words by confident women living dynamic, complex lives. Have something to explore, share, declare, or celebrate with us?
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For the past two weeks I’ve been fielding the same question over and over again, like a parent on a long road trip. Instead of the incessant “Are we there yet?,” it’s the classic New Year’s conversation starter: “What’s your resolution?”
Any other year, I’d have politely smiled (something I’ve been reluctantly perfecting since I was… what, two years old?). I’d have told the inquisitor I’d resolved to read more, volunteer more, floss more. But after living through the last few years, with the rise of #MeToo and Time’s Up, the continued fight for equal pay, and more women in Congress than ever before, I’m increasingly comfortable with truth-telling. I’m only smiling when it’s authentic.
All too often we hear messages reminding us (especially those of us who don’t fit dominant narratives, like those of “femininity” or “masculinity”, white culture, or heterosexuality) to be different. To be better (or what is too often perceived as ‘better’, at least). We’re Too Big, Too Small, Too Sporty, Not Sporty Enough, Too Loud, Too Meek, or (my favorite): Too Much. New Year’s resolutions, while helpful to some, for me, are another nagging, kids-on-a-car-trip reminder that “I’m not there yet.” And this is false. The truth? I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be, and—like so many of you—I’ve worked really hard to get here!
So this year: no resolution for me. I’m turning down the volume on all of the constructive criticism because, heck, I’m pretty great already. So here’s an authentic smile: smiling for me 🙂
After all, having compassion for yourself, thereby loving the skin you’re in, is one of the six BA Values.
A BA Woman
A BA Woman is a member of our community who has a perspective to share, ideas to spread, and words worth hearing. She's tenacious, compassionate, and lifts as she climbs. She's totally BA. She could be anyone—her words are relatable because she gets us like no one else.more posts by A BA Woman →